Not the complaint department.

Oh, the art of a good complaint.

I have to say that I never realized how different people view situations until I became a parent. Not just a parent (which comes with a host of its own complaints), but a single parent (that one word adds an insane amount of worry and yes- complaints.)

A few of my recently married with children girlfriends have called me with their list of complaints- most of which stem from 2 main problems. Usually, I am a good listener and a pretty great at offering advice, but for whatever reason when it comes to these conversations- I turn into a raging bitch.

Complaint 1: Oh gosh, its so frustrating. I have to get up with the baby during the night. My husband (boyfriend, etc) only warms up the bottle and changes the diaper- and then he goes to bed and leaves me on my own.

Response 1: As a single mom, "On my own" is a way of life. A warm bottle, a diaper change---- yeah, all of that is done "on my own". So next time you want to complain about doing things alone, perhaps you should stop and feel some gratitude for the help you do have. Oh how nice it would be to roll over and ask my significant other to get a bottle, change a diaper, rock a baby- but all of those things are done alone. Now don't get me wrong, I do understand that each situation comes with its own problems.. my rational mind allows me to acknowledge that- but during this conversations- these are the responses that come to mind.

Complaint 2: I only get two days to myself a week. And only like 4 hours on those two days combined for me time.

Response 2: First, welcome to parenthood. period. Second, as a single mom I rarely shower alone. If I want to shower without the little one- If i want to shower alone it must occur between the hours of 11p.m. and 5 a.m. Alone time/"Me Time", no longer exists in my vocabulary. Unless you count the time in school and work- and those do not fall into the category of "free time".

Again, while I understand that different situations come with their own set of complaints and problems, I wish that my friends could be thankful for the help they do have; and learn to enjoy that help and rejoice in it. Because for me, that help is not there- and I would give anything for a warmed bottle, a clean diaper, and a hug at the end of the day.